Looking for sex and intimacy tips beyond the basics? Explore our new guide on all things
.*Currently best for people who’ve had prostate cancer surgery and their partners.
The truth is that you don’t have to deal with any of this alone.
Prostate cancer can change
the way you feel about yourself
It’s OK to talk about challenges you’re facing, including sex and confidence in your manhood. You deserve support, whether it’s from a
partner, friends, family, your doctor or a counselor. Opening up about your needs, thoughts and concerns — even when uncomfortable — shows real courage.
In a lot of ways, men are brought up to be macho — you don’t complain, you don’t have things wrong with you. But prostate cancer isn’t something you can just spit on, rub dirt on, walk off, you have to deal with it.
During and after treatment, you
might experience changes to your:
-
Body changes
Every man wants to feel comfortable in his own skin. But hormone therapy can leave you feeling like you don’t even recognize yourself anymore.On hormone therapy, you might experience emotions differently than before, like having mood swings and feeling more teary than usual. All of this is normal and sometimes just knowing that what you’re experiencing is a side effect of your hormone therapy can help.
On top of your moods changing, your body will also go through changes: low
energy, extra weight, less muscle, decreased stamina, nausea — all of this and more can make you look in the mirror and say, “Who is this?”
At times like this, you'll need to dig deeper. Yes, your body is changing — but while you come to terms with this, you have to remember that your body is doing its best to survive. Be proud. And remember your support system. Talk to your family, close friends or partner — the people who love you for you.
You can also find support groups (in-person and online) where other men are going through the same thing. You may not want to talk at first — but it really is one of the best things you can do.
can also be a big help, and it’s a great way to clear your mind.Sex and
being a man
We’ll say it upfront: a man is more than his penis. He is a friend, partner, brother, father, and more.And while bodily changes can leave you worried about fulfilling your
—
or your partner’s
—
sexual needs, there are things you can do to take control. Some issues, however, will take time, patience, and honesty.
In particular, if you’re dealing with
erectile dysfunction (ED), keep in mind:
Being a man goes beyond the ability to achieve penetrative sex.
Your partner cares about you and your frustrations. In fact, seeing you upset may be more stressful than not engaging in penetrative sex.
You made a critical decision to treat prostate cancer. ED may be a side effect of treatment — but it's not the end of your sex life.
You need time to heal and regain function. The time it takes is different for everyone, so be patient.
Having the cancer is not your fault, and having ED is not your fault either.
While working through issues with sex, remember that it’s important to understand your own needs, as well as your partner’s. Men who talk openly with their partner and adjust to new routines together, typically do better in recovering their sex life. It also helps to talk to your doctor or a sex counselor about ways to feel satisfied.
More about changes to your sex life
after prostate cancer treatment
Confidence
in your manhood
Confidence is often associated with your body and sex, but your worth goes beyond the physical. As you go along the prostate cancer journey, remember that real strength is:speaking up when you need help
understanding you can’t do it all
letting others know when to step in
showing people how to support you
talking to your doctors, nurses or care team
being honest with yourself and others
Know that you are valuable to your loved ones, for who you are as a person. And if you need help remembering, it's OK to ask for what you need.
